Created
November 21, 2012 00:02
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Shakespearen insult generator
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#!/usr/bin/env ruby -wKU | |
regexp = /\w+-*\w+/ # i.e hugger-mugger | |
triplets = ::DATA.readlines.map { |line| line.scan(regexp) } | |
insults = triplets.select { |t| t.size == 3 } | |
thousts = [ | |
'Thoust', | |
'Thou', | |
'You', | |
'You Sir,', | |
'Your good mother' | |
] | |
arts = [ | |
'smells of a', | |
'reeks of a', | |
'arst a', | |
'art a' | |
] | |
def w(list) | |
list[rand(list.size)] | |
end | |
puts "#{w(thousts)} #{w(arts)} #{w(insults)[0]} #{w(insults)[1]} #{w(insults)[2]}" | |
# courtesy of http://www.pangloss.com/seidel/shake_rule.html | |
__END__ | |
artless base-court apple-john | |
bawdy bat-fowling baggage | |
beslubbering beef-witted barnacle | |
bootless beetle-headed bladder | |
churlish boil-brained boar-pig | |
cockered clapper-clawed bugbear | |
clouted clay-brained bum-bailey | |
craven common-kissing canker-blossom | |
currish crook-pated clack-dish | |
dankish dismal-dreaming clotpole | |
dissembling dizzy-eyed coxcomb | |
droning doghearted codpiece | |
errant dread-bolted death-token | |
fawning earth-vexing dewberry | |
fobbing elf-skinned flap-dragon | |
froward fat-kidneyed flax-wench | |
frothy fen-sucked flirt-gill | |
gleeking flap-mouthed foot-licker | |
goatish fly-bitten fustilarian | |
gorbellied folly-fallen giglet | |
impertinent fool-born gudgeon | |
infectious full-gorged haggard | |
jarring guts-griping harpy | |
loggerheaded half-faced hedge-pig | |
lumpish hasty-witted horn-beast | |
mammering hedge-born hugger-mugger | |
mangled hell-hated joithead | |
mewling idle-headed lewdster | |
paunchy ill-breeding lout | |
pribbling ill-nurtured maggot-pie | |
puking knotty-pated malt-worm | |
puny milk-livered mammet | |
qualling motley-minded measle | |
rank onion-eyed minnow | |
reeky plume-plucked miscreant | |
roguish pottle-deep moldwarp | |
ruttish pox-marked mumble-news | |
saucy reeling-ripe nut-hook | |
spleeny rough-hewn pigeon-egg | |
spongy rude-growing pignut | |
surly rump-fed puttock | |
tottering shard-borne pumpion | |
unmuzzled sheep-biting ratsbane | |
vain spur-galled scut | |
venomed swag-bellied skainsmate | |
villainous tardy-gaited strumpet | |
warped tickle-brained varlot | |
wayward toad-spotted vassal | |
weedy unchin-snouted whey-face | |
yeasty weather-bitten wagtail | |
cullionly whoreson knave | |
fusty malmsey-nosed blind-worm | |
caluminous rampallian popinjay | |
wimpled lily-livered scullian | |
burly-boned scurvy-valiant jolt-head | |
misbegotten brazen-faced malcontent | |
odiferous unwash'd devil-monk | |
poisonous bunch-back'd toad | |
fishified leaden-footed rascal | |
Wart-necked muddy-mettled Basket-Cockle |
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