EE - Your Brain on Triggers.md

Phase 2 Week 2: Your Brain on Triggers

One of the key aspects of Emotional Intelligence is the ability to self regulate, which could be described as moving from compulsion to choice. We can think of mindfulness as helping our thinking brain and our emotional brain communicate more clearly with each other, so they work better together. You can think of mindfulness as increasing the bandwidth between the "regulation" and "emotion" areas of the brain so that we get better information flow between them.

Triggers are when a seemingly small situation causes a disproportionately large emotional response in us such as receiving an email. Or when a dramatic, challenging, emotional situation occurs such as a confrontation or a disagreement.

Examples: Ask for examples of being triggered… in life… at DBC. What happens when people are triggered? How do they know they are triggered? What happens in the body? What are the emotions present? Ask three or four different people...

Triggers often have long histories behind them, and are often connected to a perceived inadequacy about ourselves that is the source of pain in us. For example, if I am feeling insecure about my performance in an area of study at DBC and one of the teacher asks if I need more help today it may cause a trigger reaction in me. In contrast if I am feeling confident in that area of work, my reaction to the question will be entirely different.

In this session we try and break down what happens to your brain when you're triggered. This is in the hope of empowering and educating you to understand what's going on for you the next time you're triggered. Both so that you can have compassion for yourself and others when triggered, as well to start and slow down that process, and be more in choice around how you act/react.

For the purposes of this session, we're dividing the brain into two separate "camps" if you will: the primitives and the ambassadors.

###Primitives The primitives are older parts of our brain. The developed a lot earlier and have been around longer They are also literally "less evolved" and are similar to what's found in many animals or mammals. Primitives don't care about things like socializing, love, connection, or peacefulness. All they care about is "there's a sabertooth tiger after me, run/fight/freeze for your life NOW!" For a lot of us today our lives are not regularly in imminent physical danger, but the primitives translate emotional threats and triggers in the exact same way they do physical ones. So if you've ever felt that when you and your partner were arguing, you were fighting for your life in some way, that's not far from the truth as far as your primitives are concerned.

The primitives are specifically designed to be faster than your ambassadors, to bypass logic and reason and react in a reflexive manner in order to save your life.

These are the Primitives:

Message	Primitives	Primary Function
‘Danger! Watch Out!’	Amygdalae	Scans for threat signals indiscriminately (e.g. Words, facial expressions, voice tone, body language, movements etc.)
‘Prepare for Battle!’	Hypothalamus, Pituitary and Adrenal Glands	Release chemicals (cortisol, adrenaline) to the brain to signal the need to fight, flee or freeze.
‘Charge!’	Dorsal motor vagal complex (dumb vagus)	Reacts to stress or danger by slowing down the cardiovascular and respiratory systems to prevent bleeding out.

####Amygdalae The amygdalae is a sentry, always on the watch for any sign of trouble or danger. This is anything from an oncoming car to a loud bang or a particular tone of voice or facial gesture that your partner does. Again the amygdalae doesn't care if it is actually a physical danger or a perceived emotional trigger, it responds in the exact same way: Sending a message to the Hypothalamus that there's danger!

####Hypothalamus This is the general of your primitive system. The Hypothalamus send orders to the Pituitary and Adrenal glands to begin waging war. It trusts that if needed, it will be managed later by an ambassador. But like a general, it is designed to wage war, and war it will keep waging until told otherwise by the ambassadors.

####Pituitary and Adrenal glands and dumb vagus These are the foot-soldiers of the primitives. They release cortisol and adrenaline into the blood stream, slow down the cardiovascular system, and elevate heart rate. This is designed to help you fight/freeze/flee and to slow down the feeling of physical pain and potentially bleeding out. It also makes it very hard to be empathetic, reflective, objective, or calm. It is everything you need to escape physical danger and everything you do NOT need while engaging with another human being in conflict.

In the aftermath of all of this, and depending on how long you were triggered for, your system is fried and the internal and external damage is done. Just like in war, the soldiers have done their job and it is left to the ambassadors to clean things ups. And just like in war, the bigger the damage the harder the clean up.

###Ambassadors The ambassadors are the newer, younger, more evolved parts of our brains. They are primarily what sets us apart from many other animals and mammals, they are the reason we communicate deeply, empathize, have very complex emotions and are conscious of ourselves and our thoughts.

These are the Ambassadors:

Message	Ambassadors	Primary Function
‘Calm Down’	Ventral vagal complex (smart vagus)	Exerts a calming effect by slowing the cardiovascular and respiratory systems
‘Reflect on the Past’	Hippocampus	Short and long-term memory and controls anti-stress hormones
‘Attend to Your Gut Feelings’	Insula, Right Brain	Awareness of bodily cues related to empathy, attachment and social emotional processing
‘Integrate with Logic’	Left Brain	Processes detailed information and integrates into complex meaning
‘Let’s keep the peace’	Orbitofrontal cortex	Serves as the moral and empathic centre keeping the Primitives and Ambassadors in check.

####Smart Vagus The smart vagus calms the system down, and creates a sense of tranquility and relaxation. One someone is triggered and at some point sighs or takes a deep breath it is an indication that their smart vagus is back online. This works both ways. So slowing down and intentionally taking a deep breath triggers your slower, smart vagus into action. Signaling to your system that everything is ok.

####Hippocampus The Hippocampus is the librarian of the brain. It is responsible for keeping record of facts and memory. It is good to note that when we're triggered, the hippocampus is offline. So trying to recall details of events or argue about who did what when when you're triggered is a very bad idea, because your brain literally can't remember as well.

####Insula The Insula is responsible for both self-awareness but also empathy. This is the part of the brain we are working hard to strengthen throughout EE with a lot of our content and our practice sessions. Turning your attention onto what's happening in the moment slowly will allow you to have compassion for yourself and also better understand what's happening to the other person.

####Orbitofrontal Cortex This part of the brain is our moral center. It is where we understand right and wrong, good and bad. This is the part that wants to do well by others and by the world at large. The Orbifrontal cortex is also the part that will ultimately manage the primitives and bring them back in line when they've been activated.

We're teaching you about this detailed process of getting triggered in the hopes that the next time you are triggered, slow down and check in with what's happening. This understanding can be a window into you gaining more control and having more compassion for what happens to you and others when you're triggered.

Self regulation is not about avoiding, denying or suppressing. Remember, emotions are useful and rich in valuable information, the key is to learn to listen and skillfully express them without being overwhelmed.

Five step practice in dealing with triggers:

Stop
Breath
Notice
Reflect
Respond

Stop

Whenever you feel triggered just stop. This is the most important step, it allows all the other steps to take place. In almost every case this one step is enough to make a big difference. Reference back to some examples that people gave, and what stopping might have been like.

Breath

By focusing the mind on the breath we reinforce the ‘stop’ and taking conscious breaths, especially deep ones, calms the body and mind.

Notice

Experience the emotions present by bringing attention to the body. What does this feel like in the body. In the face, neck, shoulders, chest, back? Notice the changes in tension and temperature.

Reflect

Where is the emotion coming from? Is there a history behind it? Is there a self-perceived inadequacy involved? Without judging it to be right or wrong, let’s just bring this perspective into the situation. If the situation involves another person, put yourself inside the other person looking out at you, imagine their perspective and that they are human too. Bring perspective without judging it to be right or wrong.

Respond

Bring to mind ways in which you might respond to this situation that would have a positive outcome, there will probably be several different possible responses. You do not have to actually do them, just imagine the kindest, most positive response. What would that look like?

Practice:

For this segment there are two practices that can be alternated between, Working with Triggers sitting practice and Working with Triggers pairs. It might be useful to do the first practice at least twice before doing the pairs work so that people get familiar with the sequence.

Practice: Working with Triggers sitting practice

First Practice:

Settling Attention (1 min)

Start with 3 deep breaths
Bring gentle awareness to the breathing. In and out breath, and spaces in between. Nostrils, abdomen, or "entire body of breath"

Negative Emotion (1 min)

Let's now shift gears into a negative emotion.
Bring to mind a memory of an unhappy event, (it can be the same event as previously or different). An experience of frustration, or anger, or hurt, or an experience in which you were triggered.
It’s best not to choose a traumatic or deeply upsetting event. Choose something that’s not too upsetting, but that still brings up real feeling in you.
See if you can re-live the event and the associated emotions in your mind for the next 30 seconds.

Managing Negative Emotion (5 min)

Let us now mentally practice our response strategy.
The first two steps are to stop and breath. Pausing at the onset of a trigger is a very powerful and important skill. This moment is the sacred pause. Let us practice pausing by focusing our minds on the breath, and not reacting to the emotion in any way. If you want, you may try taking slow deep breaths. And let's stay in this state of pause for another 10 seconds.
(Wait 10 seconds)
The next step is to notice. We notice by experiencing the emotion in the body. Bring your attention to your body. What does a negative or afflictive emotion feel like in the body? In the face? Neck, shoulder, chest, back? Difference in level of tension? Temperature.
Let's just experience it without judging. What is most important at this point is to try to experience emotional difficulty simply as a physiological phenomenon. Not an existential phenomenon. It is not that "I am angry". It is that "I experience anger in my body".
Let's take a minute to experience the physiology of emotion in the body.
(Wait 30 seconds)
Now we reflect.
Put yourself inside the other person looking out at you. Think about this statement: "Everybody wants to be happy. This person thinks acting this way will make him/her happy, in some way.” Without judging it to be right or wrong, let's just bring this perspective into the situation.
(Wait 30 seconds)
Now we respond.
Bring to mind ways in which you might respond to this situation that would have a positive outcome. You don't actually have to do it, just imagine the kindest, most positive response. What would that look like? Let's spend the 30 seconds or so creating that response.
(Wait 30 seconds)

Returning to grounding (1 min)

Let us now return to the present.
Bring awareness back to breath.
(Short pause)
Make tight fist with your hand, holding any of your residual anger there. Slowly open your fingers and let go of that energy.
And bring your attention back, either to your body, or your breath, whichever your mind finds more stability in.

Responses and questions (2 mins)

Second Practice: